


Inktober 2017: Eloni Lavellan

by CherryMilkshake



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Character Death In Dream, Dalish Elves, Dalish Lore, Drabble Collection, Dream Demon, F/M, Ficlet Collection, Inktober 2017, Original Character Death(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-01
Updated: 2017-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-27 21:24:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 2,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12590828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CherryMilkshake/pseuds/CherryMilkshake
Summary: Tales of an elf who lost her world.





	1. 23/ Wishes

**Author's Note:**

> A collection of the short things I wrote about [Eloni](http://cherrymilkshake.tumblr.com/post/144329902994/after-three-attempts-im-finally-happy-with-how) for Inktober.
> 
> You can read them all in number order [here](http://cherrymilkshake.tumblr.com/tagged/writing-inktober-because-i-don%27t-actually-own-any-ink/chrono).

She wishes for many things. For love lost to be returned. For past mistakes to be erased. For a better future to be written. She knows many of her wishes cannot come true, but the last… The last she will _make_ it so.


	2. 11/ Seasons

It was autumn when the Conclave turned to smoke and ash, taking Eloni's dearest person with it.

It was winter when they trudged to Skyhold through the mountains. It was winter when Solas first touched the base of her back and Eloni felt a spark she'd thought lost forever. 

It was spring when the Wardens called forth demons from the Beyond with the siren song of their own blood. It was the first time she'd seen Solas truly disturbed. And afterward, when the Wisdom spirit he'd called friend had perished, she got a glimpse of his walls truly down. It was both thrilling and terrifying.

It was summer when she drank from the Vir'abelasan. The last thing she saw before the magic overwhelmed her was Solas's stern and uncertain expression, something unreadable lurking in his eyes. 

It was autumn when Corypheus was defeated, her love finally avenged. It was autumn when Solas left, never to return to Skyhold's steps.

It was summer when he returned, the terror and darkness of his true path finally brought to light.


	3. 14/ Haunted

When Eloni was a child, dreams were an escape—a few hours when she could play in her own imaginings. When she awoke to her magic, they began to be a place of wonder and danger both, where spirits both benevolent and foul would come to speak to her wearing familiar faces.

After the Conclave's explosion and her escape from the Beyond, her sleep was blank, cut off from those spirits (Solas' influence, she learned later). But after she was able to stopper the great hole in the sky, Solas stopped watching her sleep quite so closely, and once more, she dreamed.

The first time a spirit wore _her_ face, Eloni's heart threatened to stop in her chest. She was _there_ and _whole_ , unburnt, smiling and warm and beautiful. Tears, hot and heavy, began to fall from Eloni's eyes, and she fell to her knees, body wracked with sobs.

The spirit knelt beside her, embracing her, not speaking.

"Who are you?" Eloni gasped, trying to gather herself, calling magic to her, cursing how quickly she'd become overwhelmed. 

" _I am Love_ ," the spirit said in her voice, but magnified, unearthly. " _I wish to help you say goodbye_."

Eloni clung to the spirit, until her tears ran dry and her breaths came easily. "Thank you," she murmured.

The spirit smiled and stroked her cheek, then pressed lips to her forehead. "Live well, ma vhenan. I will see you again." This time, the voice was only _hers_. 

The spirit faded away and Eloni woke.


	4. 27/ Cage

The Anchor was a beacon in the Beyond, drawing spirits and demons that normally would not approach Eloni in her dreams. She had never been a large target for demons before—she wasn't quite powerful enough to serve as a worthy vessel. (In truth, she was powerful enough to hide her aura well.) But nothing could smother the Anchor.

She woke in a cage. In front of her, Hanin was on her knees, hands bound behind her back. Her dark eyes were wide and frantic as they stared at Eloni. Her normally bouncy black curls were limp, damp with sweat. "Vhenan," she gasped as their eyes met. Her voice was a hurried whisper. "Vhenan, please, help me. They're going to kill me."

Eloni was already moving, pressing herself against the front of the cage, rattling the iron bars. They stank of rust. "Who's going to kill you?" she hissed. She tried to call upon fire, to melt the metal against her palms, but her magic didn't come. 

Hanin looked over her shoulder and back. "Hurry, please!" 

"I'm trying!" But her magic remained just out of reach, teasing her with its distance. " _Fucking_ thing!" She yanked hard on the bars.

Suddenly, fire flashed against her hands and, for a moment, Eloni was elated, glad to be able to melt the metal.

Until the screaming began. Eloni watched in horror as Hanin's body was consumed, her bounds breaking and her hands covering her face as she turned to the smoking, skeletal forms Eloni had seen in the Temple's ruins. 

As Eloni threw herself against the bars to get to her wife, the corpse shifted, drawing its hands down, revealing an eyeless, toothsome face. " _Give into your despair,_ " it whispered. " _Give me your pain and your longing. Give me yourself. What use are you now?_ "

Eloni breathed, taking in the stench of the metal and… nothing else. She didn't answer the corpse, focusing on her memories. How had she gotten there? Where was this cage? As she focused, the fog began to lift, and her magic returned to her hands.

"You will not take me, demon," she said, rising to her feet. With a wave of her hand, the cage collapsed to dust. "And you will be punished for desecrating her face."


	5. 2/ Barefoot

The Dalish do not wear shoes. As a child, she had thought it an affectation, just one more thing to make them different from humans. Her feet grew tough and strong as she grew. She learned what different earths felt like against her skin, and how to use her toes to grip tightly to trees and rocks as she learned to hunt. When her magic came, her feet kept her grounded as the power flowed through her like lightning. 

When the humans made her their Herald, they gave her a pair of boots. They held tightly to her feet, making them feel hot and uncomfortable, even in the cold of Haven. Those boots reminded her that she was _their_ creature now.

When they arrived in Skyhold, the first thing she did was slowly peel of her boots and climb the ramparts, staring over her new domain. The power of the ancient fortress thrummed through her. 

For a long moment, she was not Andraste's Herald, but Eloni once again.


	6. 19/ Nature

The trees of the Emerald Graves were beautiful despite their signification. Eloni was quiet as she walked through the forest, aware of the weight of history around her. It was apparent in the statues and ruins dotting the landscape.

Of course the shemlen had decided to claim this land for themselves—take back the Dales, indeed. The Freemen themselves were little more than a nuisance—Eloni had gotten perhaps too much skill in killing. At this point, ordinary humans were little more than an annoying hindrance than a real threat.

So, of course, they were working with the Red Templars. Had to keep it interesting, after all. 

The trees were planted over the graves of the Emerald Knights of Halamshiral. She watered them with Orlesian blood. It wasn't enough, but it felt fitting. 


	7. 22/ Lost

When she and her companions fell from the top of Adamant Fortress, Eloni didn't have time to think, only act. The rift that opened below them sizzled and crackled in the air, and they fell, fell… until they stopped.

The air was strange, odorless, despite the proximity of gently lapping water. Beside her, Cole was panicking. "No no no no…" he cried, anxiously pacing. "This is wrong. Wrought right and rigid. Can't relax. Can't release!" He clawed at his jacket.

"Calm yourself, Cole," Solas said soothingly. "We'll make it right."

"Yes," Eloni said, rising to her feet. "It's alright, Cole. We'll get you out of here soon."

"Thank you," he whispered, tugging downward on his hat. 

"Solas, do you know where we are?" Eloni asked, glancing over at Hawke and the Warden Stroud, who were conversing quietly. 

"Besides the Fade?" He looked around thoughtfully. "A demon's territory. Some variety of fear, I imagine. Note the presence of 'fearful' things. Darkness, dampness, murky water."

Eloni sighed. "I suppose it'd be too much to ask to end up in the lair of a spirit of wisdom or compassion." Cole whimpered and pulled down on his hat, squatting down into a ball. 

"Not so close to the demon we saw in Adamant, I'm afraid." Solas leaned down to tug Cole back to his feet, speaking quietly to him. "Don't submit to it, Cole." 

"The rift the large demon was going to come through was nearby in reality," Warden Stroud said. "Do you think it is still close here?"

Eloni looked to Solas. "The Fade is… different from reality," she said. "But it's still connected. It's certainly worth a try."

He nodded.

"And it's better than standing around here waiting for the demons to find us," she said brightly. "So let's get moving, shall we?"


	8. 7/ Confusion

When Solas left from the ruins of the temple, after it had risen and fallen by Corypheus' hand, Eloni knew, deep in her heart, she would not see him at Skyhold again. 

She didn't know why, but, in her cynicism, she was not surprised. He had made it clear that he desired nothing more than a professional relationship, and with Corypheus' defeat, that relationship was ended. 

The desire for knowledge, to learn from the voices of the Vir'abelasan, was stronger regardless, and Eloni was happy to throw herself into that research, even if she missed Solas' assistance and spirited debates. 

He had left confusion and bitterness in his wake, especially since he'd promised her answers. But Eloni had learned to compartmentalize long ago, and those skills were put to good use. 


	9. 26/ Realization

"Inquisitor," Cole said, and Eloni turned to face him. The Storm Coast's mud squelched under her feet as she moved. 

"Yes, Cole?" she asked kindly, a smile playing across her lips. Around her, Solas and Blackwall stopped as well. 

"Why don't you ever talk about her?" he asked, blue eyes wide and innocent.

She felt her expression shut down, becoming pinched and sour. She schooled it as best she could, but from the surprise she caught from Solas, she knew he'd noticed. "Who do you mean, Cole?" she asked, fixing the smile back into place.

" _Her_ ," he repeated. "Hanin."

She could feel two gazes descend upon her, curious and perhaps worried.

"The shape of her lips, the timbre of her voice, the feel of her fingers on my flesh," Cole muttered quickly, tugging on the brim of his hat. "She exists only in memories now, so I want to keep her there. If I share her, a bit burns away, like speaking a dream aloud." He pulled his hat lower. "I'm sorry, Inquisitor," he mumbled. "But… she would speak of you."

Eloni couldn't stop the tears that gathered in her eyes. She stepped away from the group, jumping nimbly up a rocky hill, chasing the salty sharp sea breeze. 

She was left alone for a few minutes, before Solas approached, his steps making no sound on the rock and moss. More minutes passed, filled only with the howl of wind and the distant crashing of the sea below. Eventually he said, "I've lost people too." Then, with a bit of a twisted smile. "So I know how little comments like that help."

Eloni smiled and bumped shoulders with him. "Yeah, but a little empathy always helps."

+++

"I needed to unlock the orb," Solas was explaining, and Eloni's fingers tightened on her staff. Solas continued, "So I arranged for Corypheus to find it. I didn't expect him to survive."

Her hand was shaking. The mark twitched, no longer in pain due to Solas's spell, but more of her skin flaked off as her anger built. "You killed her," she said softly. 

"What did you say?" He turned, tilting his head.

" _You killed her! You took her from me!_ " Tears ran hot and fast down her cheeks. She pointed the staff at him, the tip trembling. "She was better than us _both_ and _you killed her!_ " 

Solas closed his eyes and lowered his head. "I did. That's why I have to make this right."

"By killing everyone else?! Solas, you're completely mad!"

"There is no other way, Eloni."

"No! There is always another way. And I'm going to find it. You know why, Solas?" Her composure was returning as she gulped deep breaths into her lungs. "Because despite everything, I still care about people. _These_ people." She gestured over the stone Qunari and toward the eluvian she'd come through. 

He looked at her sadly. "I hope you find another way. I really do."

As he left through his eluvian, the huge mirror going dark as he passed through, Eloni brought her hand to her face, allowing herself a moment of utter black despair.

But then she breathed in, opened her eyes, wiped them clear, and walked back through the Qunari statues. She had research to do.


	10. 1/ Searching

A Keeper's job is to care for their clan and to seek out and preserve knowledge of the Elvhen. While I have gathered much knowledge, more than perhaps any other Keeper before me, I do not know if I can care for a clan. For years, shemlen have looked upon me as a savior, as a prophet of their distant Maker. In turn, I learned that our Creators perhaps were once only people—immortal, immensely powerful people perhaps—but not ones born of earth and sky, merely flesh and bone.

This knowledge sits deep within me, heavy like a stone on my heart. I cannot be a guide and teacher of Elvhen to come when my own faith is so deeply shaken.

So instead, I shall seek out more. My face is bare. I am no longer Lavellan's First.

But I will be Eloni, Keeper of Knowledge, and perhaps, the tamer of the Dread Wolf.

_\- an excerpt from Inquisitor Lavellan's journal, 9:44 Dragon_


	11. 31/ Final

Eloni died on the road, surrounded by her followers. To greater Thedas, she had died long ago, so her funeral was short and small. They buried her with the flowers that adorned the tattoos on her shoulders and planted a tree over the grave, chanting old rites to Falon'Din for safe passage through the Beyond.

That night, her apprentice dreamed of her. She was standing among trees so tall and thick that they might have been older than the world. She looked younger than the apprentice had ever known her, and a woman with dark skin and darker hair stood at her side.

A white wolf approached the two woman, its body glowing and shifting in a way that made it look not quite real. Eloni and the wolf contemplated each other for a long time, until the wolf bowed low, its tail between its legs. 

Eloni smiled then, and patted its white head. She turned and looked at her apprentice, flashing a wide grin before she and the woman began to glow, brighter and brighter and brighter still—until they both vanished and the apprentice awoke. 


End file.
